Rogue One

This film just left me feeling cold, empty, and depressed.

To the extent that I had to stop watching it. Get over it people. It's done. It's dead. The originals were amazing, but stop milking it.

The constant music pissed me off, the storyline was convoluted, Forest Whitaker doing a silly voice was obnoxious, the whole thing stunk. The only thing I kind of liked was the robot with attitude (hence why I used his film poster for this review). Isn't it funny that the only real and human character they managed to create was a fucking robot? And don't get me started on the guy with the fake face! What were they thinking?

Let's make some new art. DNF

Stranger Than Fiction (Re-watch)

This film was kind of dumb.

I remember I watched it in Japan when I moved there and I thought it was a good film. Turns out I was wrong. It was pretty average.

I think my tastes must've changed a bit, but it seemed too schmaltzy and contrived. Apparently it was heavily based on a book written in Spanish where the main character goes to meet the author who is writing the story he's in. But in that story, the main character commits suicide at the end. Maybe that would've made this film better?

I dunno. I think it's tough when making art about making art – there's this bit where Dustin Hoffman's character (a professor of literature) is going on about how the character's death is so beautiful, perfect and meaningful, but ultimately I thought it was kind of shit.

You can't build up the fiction inside the fiction so much – it really is on trial here.

And all the stuff with Maggie Gyllenhaal and the cookies made we want to throw up. Blurgh! Sickly sweet unbelievable love story alert. Yeah, it would've been better if Ferrel died at the end. 6/10

God's Not Dead 2

I thought we'd established this from the first film. No?

It would follow that if the first film proved CONCLUSIVELY that god is not dead, there would be no need to make a sequel.

This film succeeds in having just as dumb a premise as the first one, presumably written by someone who had never set foot inside a courthouse (just as the first one had without a doubt been written by someone who'd never set foot in a university).

But honestly, this film was even worse than the first one. There weren't as many absurd things to laugh at.

I wonder if they'll make God's Not Dead 3. I'll probs watch it. 0/10

Closer (Re-watch)

I watched this the other night when I was drunk. Because of this, I don't really have any kind of clever insights into the film.

The only thing I can say is that I'd forgotten how miserable this film makes you feel about relationships, and how awful the characters are (apart from Clive Owen and Natalie Portman, who I kind of rooted for).

Still, it nails this greedy, horrible human spirit that seems quite pervasive in the world of relationships. 8/10

Lady Macbeth

I thought this was beautifully shot. The cinematography and the lighting were great. But the characters just didn't do anything for me. They were all so horrible that there was nothing to really grab onto.

I also found some of the dialogue a bit shit. The bit where they were talking about the dogs, but really they meant Catherine was so flat.

I also didn't get Catherine at all. Why did she get into a relationship with the rapey dude? Didn't make much sense.

Not my cup of tea. Too brutal. 6/10

Moonlight

I just thought this film was so good. Sometimes I kick back against Oscar winners, but this film seriously deserves a lot of praise.

It managed to move me a great deal, without piling on the drama. There was something I really connected with in this idea of someone being trapped within their own prison.

Afterwards I read it had been shot on a really low budget - proof that you can make great films without pots of money.

Fantastic. 9/10

The Wind in the Willows (Re-watch)

I don't think I can rate this.

I've been watching this since I was two, and it still gets me.

Not to sound like a whinging grown up, but I don't think they really make children's entertainment like this anymore - with eloquent dialogue, darkness, and sadness.

I think it taught me a lot about narrative sensibility.

Brokeback Mountain

Great film. Very moving. 8/10

The Handmaiden

Unfortunately I let a lot of time lapse before writing a review of this film. I wish I'd sat down and written my thoughts as soon as I'd watched it.

Golly. What a ride it is! It's beautifully shot, and it has a very immersive plot and extremely absorbing characters.

I was impressed with how well the Korean actors spoke Japanese – I read that some of them learnt Japanese especially for the film. All of their accents and pronunciation were spot on, which was nice to see.

Apparently this is based on a British book by Sarah Waters. I loved the idea of re-telling it in colonial Korea. Brilliant.

Really enjoyed this. 9/10

Waiting for Guffman

This was OK. 6/10